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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27758770">In Another Life (I'll Be Enough)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/julissianna/pseuds/julissianna'>julissianna</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Color Me Killer: Afterimage (visual novel), Color Me Killer: Honeymouth (Visual Novel)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Heavy Angst, Love Triangles, Multi, Not Beta Read, Not Happy, Reincarnation, Spoilers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:41:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,050</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27758770</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/julissianna/pseuds/julissianna</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>They say that love is beautiful. Sweeter than honey, yet as painful as a bee sting.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Imre/Protagonist (Color Me Killer: Honeymouth), Marcell/Protagonist (Color Me Killer: Honeymouth)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>In Another Life (I'll Be Enough)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Characters belong to anger-issue.</p><p>Warning: my shitty writing skills.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They say that love is beautiful. Sweeter than honey, yet painful as a bee sting (or a broken limb in your case).</p><p> </p><p>With an ache in your heart, you look up at the man above you. Gazing into his honey-colored eyes that were usually so soft and loving. And felt the wave of a hot white pain as the cold metal of the saw kissed your neck and broke the delicate skin. </p><p> </p><p>In his eyes, you could see the love, and it was terrifying as much as it was painful that this is what you killed you. </p><p>You die with your dull eyes wide with shock.</p><p> </p><p>A shell with no heartbeat or a soul and a whisper of sweet nothings in your ear as he cradles your bloody head. And the blackness swallows everything. Including the emptiness in your heart.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>A boy with hair like gold catches your attention. And you swore that you knew him before.</p><p> </p><p>You feel the old awakening warmness in your chest as the scene plays out like a broken record. It takes three rounds of rock, paper, and scissors and a short show of shadow puppets to fall in love with him.</p><p> </p><p>Somehow you still die in this life, with a knife in your chest widening the wound in your broken heart.</p><p> </p><p>You cry because you didn't know what hurts more.</p><p> </p><p>The fact that Imre didn't choose you or that neither did his nephew.</p><p> </p><p>The blackness swallowed you again, and it's never the last time.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Marcell never tells you that he loves you. </p><p> </p><p>Not when you beg him for it. Not when your eyes are full of hatred and fury. And your hands are around his neck, nails digging and drawing blood because of his betrayal.</p><p> </p><p>Not when his uncle steals a kiss from your lips in the kitchen and looks at you with an adoring gaze like you're the most precious thing in this room. </p><p>Because in this life, you belong to Imre, and he belongs to you. And Marcell never tells you that his heart feels like an empty beehive. Only when it's far too late. And you lay dead in your shared bed because the more his uncle loved you, the less safe you were in his arms. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He was always too late.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>You wondered if happy endings existed at all at this point. </p><p> </p><p>If they only existed in fairy tales where love was still sweet like honey. And it didn't hurt like a knife that tears at your shredded heart.</p><p> </p><p>When you looked at Imre, there were times when you felt it was possible. And that maybe there's a happy ending for you too in this never-ending hell. Because when you looked at him, you saw only the love and the want and neediness for you. </p><p> </p><p>You wondered if happy endings existed in the next life. </p><p> </p><p>Because they don't exist in this life. </p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>It's Marcell who finds you this time, And he is everything you love and want. </p><p> </p><p>But when the empty bottle of Whiskey drops. You feel your heart heartbreaking along with the bottle that shatters. He mumbles something about never going to feel a certain way again. And his eyes are swimming with an emotion you're too scared to read.</p><p> </p><p>You cry the most when he aims the sledgehammer at you.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In this life, you're not enough.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Please, Please, this time, pick me!" you're not sure who you are begging for at this point. Your broken leg fails to support you as you wobble and try to stay still. </p><p> </p><p>Both men look at you. And you know that your pleas fall on deaf ears.</p><p>It doesn't stop you from gasping in fear when Imre drags the knife in closer. </p><p> </p><p>You know he doesn't want this, but it isn't enough. And you're never enough. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"I've almost made it".</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"I love you édesem"</p><p> </p><p>You don't answer back.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Imre tastes like rich chocolate and caramel that lingers at the tip of your tongue. </p><p> </p><p>Marcell tastes like thick honey and vodka that overwhelms you and in the worst and the best way possible. </p><p> </p><p>You struggle to choose between the flavors as you're swimming in the black void for what seems like forever.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Imre never chooses you. </p><p> </p><p>Not when you reject him and mistreat him. Not when you attack his nephew, not ever when you're this furious and broken and angry at everything.</p><p> </p><p>He never does. And your heart feels like it's being stung by endless wasps.</p><p> </p><p>Still, you don't feel regret when he slices through your throat. And the blood spills all over the floor.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>You wake up in a strange room and in a bed that doesn't belong to you. There is something familiar about this scenario that you can't pin exactly. </p><p> </p><p>The door opens. And you look at the man in front of you, who offers you a small pill in one hand and a cup of hot chocolate. </p><p>His smile is soft and warm. And for a moment, you relax and accept his offering. </p><p> </p><p>You try to ignore the panic at the back of your head. </p><p> </p><p>You don't remember or know anything, but he tells you everything. And you trust him with your life.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p><br/>Sometimes, the way Marcell says your name sounds more like a confession of both love and hate.</p><p> </p><p>When he wraps his hands around your neck, all you do is close your eyes and drift away.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The beetles aren't the only thing that leaves marks on your skin.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"I'm only doing this Because I love you!" </p><p> </p><p>You stop yourself from protesting, a faint memory crosses your mind that you've already been in this position before. </p><p> </p><p>The hammer hits your leg and this time, you both cry together. </p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>"Eden", you whisper against his skin, wrapping your arms around his waist. When he kisses your face, you smell the lingering liquor on his lips.</p><p> </p><p>You can feel a painfully familiar tug at your heart. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Even so, you die in this life as well.</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>There are constant things In every carnation.</p><p> </p><p>One is that you love Imre, in every life and every story. Whether he lets you have your happy ending or not.</p><p> </p><p>Two is that you love Marcell as well. Beautiful, broken Marcell who doesn't realize he loves you back until it's too late. But you love him regardless. </p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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